Also on sale is The Happy Couple the latest full-length show from New Old Friends. We are previewing it on Friday 24th June at The Rondo, as it is a preview tickets are a steal at just £5. The poster is below, can you spot the deliberate mistake from the ‘pepole’ who brought you Anti-Panto?

Tickets are only a fiver because it will still be in the work-in-progress stage. We’ll have it as polished as we can but realistically it’ll be scruffy around the edges. I can confirm that all the usual N.O.F. tropes are in there, we have daft wordplay, daft songs, daft slapstick, daft conversations, daft characters, daft dancing and some truly wonderful ‘groaners’. A groaner is a gag that is so bad it makes you groan, bad but you love them. We do. It wasn’t until I read over The Happy Couple that I realised I had a recognizable style, but there is a clear line through all the work I’ve produced. I originally wanted to be a very clever Radio 4 style wit, but I’m happy to have settled in to a purveyor of a slightly naughty blend of whimsy and wordplay. The first song of The Happy Couple contains one of my all-time favourite joke rhymes I’ve ever written; Mum I know you’re listening, that bit about the drug taking, is entirely fictitious, I’ve no way of knowing that heroin is delicious. You have to work a bit to make it scan, but Heather performs it with brilliant aplomb, in fact she absolutely nails the entire song and that alone is worth the measly £5 admission.

In other news, our second Pick & Mix is looking to be a real stunner, line up announced very soon. More info and booking details for that here. We loved the last one, and all of you who came seemed to too, so hopefully this time around will be like the Peugot and go from strength to strength. It’s June 4th at 8pm still at The Rondo, Bath. Be great to see you there. In fact if you contact my on twitter @thisactorslife with a topic you would like to see rendered in comic sketch form we will oblige you.

What is a Bibliotherapy Spa Session I hear you cry? (If you’re thinkin “I didn’t cry anything.” I apologise but the vast majority did and this is a democratic blog) a Bibliotherapy Spa Session consists of me going into Mr B’s being installed in a comfy chair by a fire, waited on with hot drinks and cakes and having a long chat about all things literature and which books I like and don’t like. At the end of the conversation my Mr B book monkey will dash off and collect a pile of books to the value of whatever Spa Session price my Nan has bought me.

Exciting.

For my joke today. Now I can’t remember if I’ve used this one before but the nature of it means its not important.

I like to introduce new words into my comedy so spend a lot of time with the dictionary. I was doing just that when I came across the word battology, it means to pointlessly repeat oneself.

I like to introduce new words into my comedy so spend a lot of time with the dictionary. I was doing just that when I came across the word battology, it means to pointlessly repeat oneself.

I like to introduce new words into my comedy so spend a lot of time with the dictionary. I was doing just that when I came across the word battology, it means to pointlessly repeat oneself.

Ah you get it.

The writing is going well, although my confidence took a knock when the other half of New Old Friends read the script and the first thing she said was “There are lots of good gags, but I don’t get the story.” Bugger. But one of those gags for you now:

Oh and Gee

You mean OMG

Do I?

Yeah, its an acronym of Oh My God.

Oh, I thought it was a retro-slang amalgam of Oh, as in oh golly, and Gee as in gee whiz.

Jokey joke!

No, I’m talking about sitting down at my lap-top and writing a 90 minute play with plenty of laughs in. Its called The Happy Couple and I’ve set myself the challenge of writing a story about two people in love without all the usual cliches of infidelity, break-ups, beatings, death etc. A lovely and noble aim, problem is conflict is the soul of both drama and comedy. Which leaves me with whimsy, surrealism and word play. So far my favourite effort is a bizzare episode involving a radio, sheeps milk and the punch line “In space no-one can hear ewes cream!”

As I said writing comedy is hard.

The Happy Couple is on at The Rondo theatre in Bath June 22nd tickets are a mere £5 available from 01225 463362.

I’ve grown up in a staunch lefty house and always had an ingrained dislike of the Conservatives without honestly feeling it in my bones, my political awareness started with 1997 and my mum literally becoming a champagne socialist after the victory. As we all know New Labour acted like total pricks and I kept hearing that they were behaving like Tories, so I couldn’t really work up the anger at these supposedly priviledged elitest fucksticks. So thank you Mr Cameron you’ve gifted me a lovely little reserve of (abiding I’m sure) hatred for you, your party and your total disregard for those less fortunate with money. New Labour may have acted like pricks but you sir have taken my disgust to all knew and far too vulgar lows. At least I feel like I fit in at lefty-gatherings now.

In other news I wrote a joke the other day:

I was approached on the street by someone trying to get me to invest in pharmeceutical giant Glaxo-Smith-Klein, and I almost did. But then I thought “Don’t give them any money, they’ll just spend it on drugs!”

Current favourites are Tig Notaro – a dry American lady who was very funny indeed. And New Art Club – a pair of likeable Brits who have one gag, they are an experimental dance company performing ludicrous dances on unsuitable subjects (shit on your shoe, an IRA beating) luckily the have the charm and charima to make each dance hilarious. There really isn’t anybody quite like them, the lurid unitards they wear are funny enough to hold a show even if the dancing doesn’t entertain (which it will)

So good times being had by moi, obviously I miss Blighty’s charms most notably my family and gorgeous fiance, but it feels good to be surrounded by so many talented comics. I’m trying to find an open spot to do some stand-up out here but the festival is in full-swing so most things are already filled. I will report back with findings. I have taken the sum total of zero photographs which I will attempt to rectify from now on and share with you peeps.

Yes, I am in Australia. Specifically Melbourne, at the International Comedy Festival. It’s a bit cool innit? I’ve been put in a plane for 22 hours and given a swanky room in a city centre hotel (very nice) and on top of all that I’m getting paid to be funny. I just have to be funny now. Today is the day of our first show in the dotMaze, which is a HUGE installation in Federation Square, a public  space which is slap-bang in the middle of Melbourne. It looks amazing and is already creating quite a stir. Its my first time with the company (dotComedy) and I’m very excited to get to work later on today.

I realise there are no jokes in this little entry, but its pretty informative and I did sing to you at the start.